countrygal1886 asked:
My fiance yells at our son for pulling hair and hitting. I think that he is to younge for this harsh of treatment. I dont even think that he is even doing it on purpose he is only 7 months old. It looks like a arm spasm to me not that he is meaning to hit.
Seems how they start from birth I really don't believe that they are doin it on purpose. I do agree with telling them no though. Thanks for all the input and advice.
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My fiance yells at our son for pulling hair and hitting. I think that he is to younge for this harsh of treatment. I dont even think that he is even doing it on purpose he is only 7 months old. It looks like a arm spasm to me not that he is meaning to hit.
Seems how they start from birth I really don't believe that they are doin it on purpose. I do agree with telling them no though. Thanks for all the input and advice.
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{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
NEVER! Yelling doesn't help anything regardless of the childs age and a 7 month old definately doesn't pull hair on purpose! he's just a baby. Your fiance needs to check out some parenting classes and I would be leary of him. Any man that would yell at a 7 month old…I would worry what he will do as the child gets older.
i think your fiance is way too harsh. your kid's just 7 months old to receive such a treatment.
It depends on harsh he is with the baby. Yes they do understand what no is. You have to tell them no. When the baby hits or pulls your hair just tell them no. You don't need to hit or scream at the baby they are learning.
A child doesn't need to be yelled at, especially at that age. They don't understand. Redirection is best or gently grabbing his hand and holding it for a few seconds should be adequate. Teach with love and your child will turn out to be great.
instead of yelling a firm "no hitting" should do. that is, once he learns what "no" means. please tell me he understands that already, if not you're already falling behind.
Nobody should ever yell at a baby because the baby does not understand.
yeas, they can't help it. try being a little more sensitive toward the baby. they need a lot of attention. FRIENDLY attention. trust me, i'm an expert. [babysitting]
I used to pretend to cry–that worked well. They are pretty compassionate little buggers.
Books will tell you to give them something more interesting.
Yelling just makes you look like a cruddy parent.
Babies don't have the ability to use words to voice how they're feeling, so pulling hair and hitting is their way of expressing anger. Also, it can be just a way of exploring people's reactions. I don't think yelling is ever the answer. Even if he's not doing it on purpose, gently pull his arm away and hold it at his side. Then say gently but firmly,"It is not okay to pull someone's hair/hit someone. That hurts." If he continues to do it, place him in his crib for five minutes and then try again.
I believe children learn the most early on, and the eariler they learn that YOU are the one in charge and that you will stop them from doing wrong things, the better off he will be.
never! tell your fiance he needs some anger management classes!
I don't think he should be yelled at ever. Yelling doesn't resolve anything. I don't think a 7 month old child is going to understand being punished, they can't comprehend punishment for wrong doings. As for the pulling hair issue, I would just gently take his hand and say, "Don't pull mommy's hair!" In a soft tone. Honestly, I don't think a child can learn at that age not to do something. I have a 6 month old son and I wouldn't ever yell at him right now.
Yelling at a baby is not the answer. A stern face and "No" is all you need to be doing right now. A 7 month old is just exploring textures and his grasping skills. He is too young to understand. I think your fiance' needs classes on child development so that he can have reasonable expectations of the child. I worry about a person that yells at or hits a baby. There may be deeper issues involved here. I am concerned for your child's safety. If there is yelling over something this simple shaking may not be far off.
yelling at a baby that is 7 months is unexceptable.please watch your fiance very closely this is a bad sign of his ablity to handle children.my advice is to let just you remove the the hair from your baby s hands.parenting classes i would aslo reccommend for you as for him he needs them and anger mangement as well.and if he chooses not to i would not stay with him for fear of abuse to your child.
Just say no. Reserve yelling to if they're getting ready to do something dangerous to themselves.
Yelling at a 7 month old!! Sounds like the belt will be coming out soon.
I would agree that a certain tone of voice should be used to enforce good or bad behavior, but yelling isn't appropriate for a 7 month old. A firm but gentle "no" should do.
Your baby is experimenting with touching and learninng about his surroundings, and does not have the fine motor skills (muscle control/ hand eye coordination)to do so in a graceful, gentle way. This is normal and necessary for your childs development.
Your child will only begin hitting (or eventually, shouting) purposefully when he learns this through example.
Hitting will typically begin at an age where the child is more socially involved yet still only aware of their own perspective. (unable to understand or express frustration in situations where they need to be patient or share with others)possibly 2 years old.
If your fiance doesnt want your child to hit you should teach your child to deal with frustration in a calm, productive, and consistant manner by example.
There is never a time to yell at a child let alone a baby.Don't let anyone abuse your baby.
Yelling? That's no way to correct a baby's behavior. Take the baby's hand and get the hair out of it and say "No hair pulling" Then take his hand and stroke it in your hair and say "nice touching/soft touching" something like that.
Be consistant. When you want to stop a bad behavior you have to give them another behavior to replace it.
Yelling at a 7 month old is very harsh, and not effective. It will make him fearful, or insecure in exploring his world. When he is hitting or pulling, he is experimenting with his environment, he doesn't even have the capabilities of knowing what pain to another is. Just tell your fiance to stop yelling.. Yelling at a baby will change their spirit and well being emotionally. Ask him " How will your son become a happy, successful learner by doing this?" Babies need warm hearted people who talk, laugh, and offer them the world for a playground. Use redirection by distracting with a toy or moving them onto another activity.
Do you really want to marry this person?? I am leaving the father of my children just so they can be children again..
they are 5yrs and 1yr old, just a word of warning before your son ends up the one suffering later on….
should teach them not to do that at about 1 ! For the A$$holes saying don't yell or spank kids! DONT listen your kids will run you sooner or later if you neglect to let them know who is in charge! SuperNanny and Nanny 911 are awesome shows to watch but they dont work thats why its called reality TV and not Just REALITY!
However im not saying beat them either! Im saying raise your kinds they best you can! The GREATEST gift you can give your child is discipline! Without that they are no good to society!
So although I BELIEVE your fiance is doing the right thing I think it maybe a little to early for your child to understand!
And baby girl it is no arm spasm he means to hit and pull hair but he doesnt know better not to! That's when parents come into play you teach them! Do what you and ur fiance think is best!
Wow, "Dancer" you've got some problems. The BABY is 7 months old for crying out loud…no pun intended.
And "Fisha" above, we used to do that with our little brother. He'd waddle over, put his arm on our backs and make crying sounds himself.
As for "CountryGal", if you intend to marry this over-bearing, incompassionate person who yells at a baby, I strongly suggest you make him take parenting classes before you do. He's yelling at a baby now, just think what he's going to do when the baby gets older. Your fiance has some problems of his own.
You should tell the baby no as so as they start doing it. If you don't it might be a problem later on.
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